SELF - C. 🍨 A. 🖼️ R. ⏩ E. 👗

Hi friends, 

Have you ever gone out on a solo date?

I hear of people taking solo vacations as a way to reconnect with Self and it sounds so romantic and expansive… but I can’t help but think:

Will I look like a loner, loser out in the world by myself?

My husband’s comfortability with this is what made me realize just how scared I am. For work, he’s often sent to random locations by himself so he’s in the practice of going out to eat, going wine tasting, or just showing up to an event alone.

He doesn’t think it’s weird like I do. And he always ends up meeting cool people and having an incredible time.

Well, last weekend I came face to face with this silly little fear of mine.

My husband was stuck somewhere in Oregon, so I planned my usual solitude activities — journal, read, bake sourdough, do yoga, stay in my pajamas all day, etc.

12 hours away, my husband spent his Saturday going out to breakfast, hiking to a waterfall, wine tasting at two biodynamic wineries, making friends with the winemaker… 

I was happy for him and I thought, “I could not do a day like that alone.”

Then Sunday, I woke up thinking I’d do the exact same thing as the day before when my husband called and asked if I’ drop something off at a winery by our house that he’s been working with. He told me to go there, drop the thing off, then while I’m there he suggested I do a tasting and hangout for a bit to make the most of the trip.

My immediate reaction was, no way.

I went to my anxious, insecure side and asked him to set everything up for me so that I wouldn’t even have to get out of the car or see anyone, just drop the thing off and leave.

But when I got there, I didn’t see anyone waiting for me in the parking lot 🫤

I took a deep breath, hopped out of the car, and walked along the gorgeous vineyards towards the tasting area.

As I walked up I was greeted with smiles and was asked if I wanted to do a tasting. I pushed away the thought that it’s weird to hang out somewhere alone, and I said, “sure”.

I sat down at the bar and immediately fell into a beautiful conversation with the people sitting next to me. We all talked for almost two hours about our plans to travel to Italy, about teaching, about writing, and of course, wine 🍇🍷

When I decided to leave, I then brought up my actual reason for being there and asked where I should drop off what I brought.

None of it was weird at all. 

I never even needed a “reason” for being there other than to enjoy the day.

If you’re like my husband and are reading this thinking, “Yeah obviously… Why would you be scared to talk to strangers or show up to a winery alone?” 

Well then, lucky you. Keep on doing what you’re doing and living your best life. 

But if you’re like me, take this as your sign to try a solo date! You have no idea who you could meet or what beauty you can discover when you are completely open to the unexpected.

Now enough storytime. Here’s this week’s reflection:

SELF - C. 🍨 A. 🖼️ R. ⏩ E. 👗

🍨 Cooking:

Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream 💚🍫🍦

As someone who was scared of dairy and fully eliminated it from my diet for almost 5 years… I can’t believe I’m saying this…

…I have hopped on the raw milk train and I no longer experience any digestive discomfort, skin breakouts, or any negative symptoms from dairy now that I’ve figured out that quality is everything.

In California at grocery stores like Sprouts, you can get raw milk from farms that care for their animals well — allowing them to live as cows are meant to live, freely roaming pastures eating grass only 🐄🥬🥛

When you consume healthy dairy products in their natural state (not pasteurized which kills all the beneficial nutrients), you get all the incredible digestive enzymes, vitamins, and minerals that leave you feeling incredible.

So after putting raw milk in my coffee every morning for the past couple of months and feeling amazing, when my mom asked if I wanted her old ice cream maker, I said, “yes”.

This ice cream felt so clean and nourishing. I had not an ounce of guilt or discomfort after indulging.

If you don’t have an ice cream maker, see if you have a friend who will let you borrow so you can try this! 

If it’s something you’d use often, the one my mom gave me is nothing fancy. It’s only $50 at Walmart right now.

All that said, will you catch me eating a tub of ice cream from the grocery store? 

🙅‍♀️🤢

I don’t find it fun to consume things that make me feel like I’m about to die after.

BUT this homemade ice cream with high-quality ingredients is a winner for me :)

🖼️ Art:

Last weekend I bit the bullet and stepped foot in my least favorite city all in the name of art 🎨

My mission was to find something that evoked some kind of emotion in me and try to connect with the artist’s story.

The whole reason I chose to include this art section in Sunday Self-C.A.R.E. is to push myself to tap into my creativity and explore a more artistic way of living.

As a kid, I identified as an athlete which brought me to the conclusion that I am not creative and anyone who is… is usually weird. 

I wanted to fit in. Be cool. Be stoic and unemotional. Nothing like an artist.

Only recently have I started to desire a deeper, more meaningful way of living. Where everything is not always just fine. Where pain can be expressed and healing can be beautiful ❤️‍🩹

So since I live near Sacramento, I decided to go to a place where art is the obvious centerpiece.

At first, I thought I’d walk around for 5 minutes, see some old paintings, then turn around and apologize for wasting my husband's time by asking to go there.

But after the initial, “What are you doing here” thoughts, it actually was very fun and I found something…

Something that gave me full-body chills... Something so extraordinary, I’m still pondering it days later.

It’s not a hidden gem or anything because I know this is a very popular painting, but this is the one that spoke to me. This is the one that hit in the exact way the artist intended when he said his hope was for his work to make people think about humanity and their role in society.

It’s “My World and Yours (And the Gods Created the World in Their Own Image)” by Irving Norman.

I won’t try to unpack my view on it here, but if you get a chance to see this in person, I encourage you to look at it for a few minutes.

It says so much.

Do you have a favorite artist whose work resonates? I’m new to this world so I’d love to hear if you do!

⏩ Reading: In Five Years: A Novel by Rebecca Serle

I flew through this novel last week and enjoyed it so much.

The story starts with a high-achieving woman in her 20s who is in a nice relationship with another career-focused man. She ends up getting engaged exactly when and how she planned and everything about her life was on track.

On the night of her engagement, she falls asleep and wakes up 5 years in the future. 

Her life is nothing like she expected — new, fancy apartment, new ring on her finger, new man in the apartment acting as her boyfriend… Completely off script.

The main character wakes up from this premonition and knows it felt way too real to be just a dream. 

From there the story unfolds and in fact, nothing goes as she could’ve prepared for. Even with that glimpse into the future, what you think happens to bring her there is not at all what unfolds.

I love it so much because that is the way life goes. 

Even if you think you know where you’re headed, life is always working out in ways that you couldn’t even dream up. 

No matter what heartbreak or failure you experience, in the end, everything is as it’s meant to be and life is more beautiful than you ever thought possible.

Right?

Like when you look back, can you think of a time when something terrible happened that you initially thought would ruin you…. But with time it has actually made your life better?

100%

This novel was a fun reminder of that and it was just so bingeable, perfect for my Saturday at home alone.

👗 Enthusiasm:

Lately, I’m excited about filling my closet with only clothes made from natural fibers.

Like most people, who begin a nontoxic living journey, I started by focusing on food, cleaning supplies, and personal care products. 

I didn’t prioritize changing the clothes I wear until I got those areas nailed down first. Then of course, the fun way that life works, at the exact time I started thinking about this next step, I started feeling itchy in all my unnatural clothes.

Then every morning after my walk, I’d go to get in the shower and notice a rash in the exact outline of whatever tank top or sports bra I was wearing. At this point, I knew my body was rejecting the unnatural fibers.

A rash is a sign of imbalance. A detoxing of something my natural body doesn’t like and I appreciate my body for letting me know when something is off so I can do something about it.

I’m not fully where I want to be with an entire closet of only natural clothing, but I’ve gradually been able to replace a lot with these brands:

Some others that I haven’t bought from yet, but look amazing are:

Fashion is important because it affects your confidence so I understand that sometimes I might just go ahead and wear that dress from Revolve because it’s so freaking cute!

But to make sure that the majority of the time I’m wearing natural clothing that supports my health, I no longer purchase clothes made from toxic materials like polyester, nylon, or synthetic fibers.

✨I do occasionally subscribe to a clothing rental service called Fashion Pass, where I can borrow clothes for an event or special occasion. 

This gives me variety but ensures that I’m not tempted to spend stupid amounts of money on toxic clothes that I don’t want to be wearing most of the time.

Building my nontoxic dream closet makes natural fibers my go-to and gradually eliminates unnatural fabrics as an option.

✨What’s helped me avoid the temptation of overconsumption is unfollowing fashion accounts on social media and choosing to follow the natural clothing brands listed above.

If this is completely new to you, I explain the importance of wearing natural fibers more in detail in my ebook. 

Start by swapping clothes that you sweat, sleep, and lounge in 🏃‍♀️🛌🛋️ 

Swapping to 100% organic cotton underwear, pajamas, and workout clothes alone can greatly reduce your toxic load.

Which section resonates with you most this week?

Solo dates? Ice cream? Art museums? In Five Years? Natural clothing?

Reply and let me know 🥰

🤍 Jaclyn